BUT GOD...

When I wrote about "Working Through Trials In Your Life" back on July 3rd I had NO IDEA what was just around the corner, or just how painful life could be. There is a definite difference between physical and emotional pain. The amazing thing is just how emotional pain affects you physically.

When the trial hit me it was completely unexpected. I was taken totally unaware and felt as though my heart and soul were being ripped out of my chest. My initial reaction was to curl up in a ball on the floor and sob uncontrollably. I NEVER thought I could grieve so fully and completely over something. But I did and it hurt and my emotional state seemed to dictate to my physical that it was going to give out. Fortunately I had a doctor that was helpful and when I contacted him with the news and asked for help for my physically crashing body, he knew just what to give me - a little something to cover the shock of the situation along with a little something for the grieving that would inevitably ensue. What a wise man he was. His words a soothing balm, as the words of so many well-meaning precious family members and close friends.

When major trials first hit - it's hard to know HOW you will react. One never knows until they're in the throes of the challenge, then they begin to slowly but surely discover just what they're truly made of. I was "jelly," shaken to the core of my being. I was ashamed of my reaction. But more than that I was saddened by what seemed to me a lack of faith. As the days wore on I thought I should be getting over it...I should be back on my feet...I should be able to work...I should be able to focus - but several days later, I still couldn't shake it.

BUT GOD...that has been my mainstay this entire time. The fact that HE would not hold it against me. The fact that HE would not punish me for my lack of faith. BUT GOD loves us, no matter what! He will never leave us or forsake us. His mercy is new every morning, His grace is sufficient. What a truly mighty God we serve, that even in the midst of my sorrow HE provided joy. I don't know that I'll ever look at those TWO WORDS the same again. For I claim them in all circumstances now...BUT GOD...

His people said this...BUT GOD... His people acted this way...BUT GOD... in all his goodness and mercy had other plans for His children and drew them to Himself that they might live and have an abundant life! SO we're walking through some major trials. SO our hearts are hurting and we don't know what to do or say. BUT GOD knows all, sees all and is in ALL! And so I sit here, knowing that there is truly nothing I can do about the situation, about the pain, about the future except leave it in God's hands! There's no "buts" about it!!!